1002 Things Before I Kick the Bucket » Meme

Relevant Reading – The Taking Flight Edition

Chelsea — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 00:53:53 +0000

This weekly round up is all about my least favourite part about travelling: flying.

Comfortable flying tips
via Venere
Comfortable flying tips for those making the long haul to another continent.

Plane Answers
via Gadling
A pilot answers questions sent in by readers. Always informative and entertaining.

Common questions about flying
via Gadling
Separate from the previous link, just an entry with some questions I think we’ve all asked ourselves.

Relevant Reading – the Thanks but No Thanks Edition

Chelsea — Sun, 12 Apr 2009 08:50:57 +0000

This week is all about things that aren’t about to make it onto my life list any time soon. I’m trying to be adventurous and open to new experiences, but some things are just beyond my personal threshold. Case in point: Pulpit Rock. The articles are still great and interesting, the subjects just happen to make me queasy and unhappy to think about.

10 Most Exotic Asian Foods
via Nellie at Wild Junket
I should mention here that the chicken feet actually look somewhat good…but the rest of it isn’t about to be consumed by me anytime soon.

This video!!!

This video is insane and I cannot believe people stand there!!

Most Dangerous Roads in the World
I hate driving in Calgary Alberta, I doubt I would survive these unscathed.

North Korea
This blog entry is surprisingly beautiful and has some wonderful photography. It actually kind of made me want to go to North Korea, but I think it might still be a little bit too out there for me. The forced participation in musicals is what does it for me.

My Top Ten

Chelsea — Sat, 11 Apr 2009 12:27:54 +0000

I think by now my list has every continent, and possibly even every country, on it. Of course, like with all things, I have a few favoured destinations, ones that distract me from everything.

Snow = like Iceland. Boring roofs = not like Iceland

1. Iceland
Most people like warm destinations, but being Canadian, I prefer familiar temperatures and not having to buy new clothes to travel. I also like colourful roofs, which Iceland has an abundance of. Oh, and there’s a penis museum.

2. Morocco
Whenever I dream I’m travelling, I dream I’m in Morocco. There was this one time I dreamed I was in Italy but people were trying to kill me and I stabbed someone in the neck, very vividly, so you can see why I opt more for Morocco. One time someone asked me if it was the beaches that drew me towards it, and I replied “Morocco has beaches?”. There’s something about the food, the giant deserts and the culture that I like, all of which I, of course, learned about from Brad Pitt in Babel.

3. Russia
Adam says if I go to Russia I will get stabbed and die. Why does he think I want to go? Can you imagine that twitter message? EPIC! “Landed in Moscow, went through customs, agent stabbed me in the eye”. Really, I just want to go to Russia for two reasons:
a. My Russian history teacher had a mesmerizing moustache and was totally hot.
b. That same teacher told me about a guy who dresses up like Lenin and runs around in St. Petersburg

4. Los Angeles
I’m going to find the Zachary Quinto and follow him around until he files a restraining order. Hopefully he’ll spend some time at tourist hot spots so I can see those too.

5. Cuba
I just want to be a Communist and lay on the beach without abandon.

6. Afghanistan
While I hate to see myself as being too good for a war zone, I can also see how deciding to travel freely to one as people try to escape it is a bit…well wrong. I met a guy from Afghanistan when I was in high school and he was one of the nicest people in the world and looked really good with a popped collar. He told me once about how he had shot a gun and my tiny white 17 year old Canadian brain exploded. I really want to go there, but I think I might wait for it to settle down a bit there, which I hope it does eventually.

7. Yemen
I was once told Yememi men do it better, and I now want
a. a shirt that says that
b. to wear that shirt in Yemen
Plus it might be the closest I ever get to being in Saudi Arabia.

8. Peru
I think a lot about the fact they eat guinea pigs. It fascinates me. I want to see the farms they keep them in. And try eating one, maybe. They also have alpacas which are indisputably the most awesome animal ever to exist in the entire Universe. They do not eat the alpacas from what I understand, except in rare cases, which makes Peru super cool in my books.

mmm Asian stuff.

9. Japan
Adam really got me into Japan. I used to have no interest in going at all, but after Adam kept blabbing on about wanting to go there, he totally changed my mind. And I love Asian stuff, like the food and wonderful English translations on packages.

10. New Zealand
I have a secret passion to be a sheep herder. And they have the steepest hill in the world and I want to roll down it in a garbage can.

An Exercise in Futility

Chelsea — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 17:50:03 +0000

One of the biggest problems I face in life (according to my mom, dental hygienists and my boyfriend’s relatives) is that I don’t have any sense of direction. Yes, I get lost easily, but I mean “sense of direction” more in a Harvard-grad-father-asking-his-coming-of-age-teenage-son-if-he-plans-to-pledge-Kappa kind of way. A where is my life going, as opposed to “where is the train I am on going,” kind of thing. I really, truly have little idea of what I want in life in terms of jobs and making an income. I have a random collection of life goals that really don’t add up to a career or really much of anything other than a kick-ass time on the planet. Everyone I know has some career aspirations by this point, which leaves me drifting alone among the options. Whenever people ask me what I plan to do (dental hygienists are the worst offenders for this, seriously) I just say “government work” which they picture as an cubicle deal but I picture as super secret ninja spy. Obviously this isn’t what I want, because wearing a mask all day would remind me too much of working in Disneyland as a giant puppet.

Rather than taking a stupid online test that will give me 50 possible careers most suited for me (note: these in the past have always included judge, which is awesome, because I would totally style myself after Judge Banks from Fresh Prince) I think it would be best to make a short-list of careers I definitely do not want and a compilation of careers I think I would be both interested in and totally kick ass at.

DO NOT WANT

Fish gutter (the smell, mostly)
Seamstress in the 1870s
Anything to do with the creation of buildings
Dental hygienist
Janitor at Peep Show establishment
Doctor who performs colonoscopies (though it would offer for a multitude of awesome jokes…)
Mother of fifteen
Hugh Hefner’s sponge bath assistant
Intestinal bacteria (just think if your human host ate a whole bulb of garlic, what would that be like?)
Participant on Hell’s Kitchen
Cow breeder (you have to catch semen…really now)

DO WANT

Professional zombie hunter
Japanese cartoon voice actor
Tiffany (touring malls, singing the best song ever written over and over? HECK YES!)
Pillow comfort analyst
Richard Branson’s best friend
Camera person for sea turtle documentaries
Baroness (I don’t honestly know what this is, but it just sounds so cool)
Cheesecake taster
Giant squid (shooting ink and living in the ocean, could life really offer a better profession?)
Town drunk

Have Music, Will Travel

Chelsea — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 00:13:42 +0000

So I took a break from cleaning, studying, writing and all that good stuff this afternoon and used it to clean up my music collection. Since part of the cleaning process let me properly set up my giantess of a laptop that holds my music collection, I’ve also been able to listen to it for a few solid hours. Between the downloads, moving, deleting, and – sure enough – grooving, I got to thinking about how important music was to my travels this summer. It kept me company during lonely nights in Guelph, drowned out chatting people on the overnight bus to New York, and distracted me on long flights across the continent. My Ipod only holds 2 GB, but it provides me with hours of entertainment on the road and gives me some solace when I’m missing certain people’s company.

Here are my fave songs for certain travel situations!

Needing Sand and Sun: Madera – Hey Ocean!
Packing: In Love With a Bad Idea – Matthew Good
Pre-Flight Jitters: Time Bomb – Beck
First Leg: The Distance – Cake
Roadtrips: Running Down a Dream – Tom Petty
Overnight Travel: Turn Up the Stars – Hey Ocean!
At the Hostel: What I Got – Sublime
No Itinerary: Ruby Soho – Rancid
Traveling Alone: Two Hoboes- DJ Champion
Train Travel: On A Train – Waking Eyes
Lost and Confused: Sing Me Spanish Techno – The New Pornographers
Homesickness: I Wish You Were Here – Pink Floyd
Destination No Where: To Here Knows When – My Bloody Valentine
The Ride Home: Jimmy – Tool
Back At Home Blues: Everyday is Exactly The Same – Nine Inch Nails